Because nothing says “national defense” like excluding those who are not Superman
Ah, the glorious United States Army, where now even a poorly cured cold could keep you out of the club. The Pentagon, in its infinite wisdom, decided that people with heart failure, schizophrenia in treatment, or a slight history of paraphilic disorders (yes, that includes those who collect used socks) are no longer welcome in its ranks. Because? Because, it seems, war is now a contest of mental and physical fitness, not a matter of national defense.
Who needs soldiers when you can have robots (or at least recruits with no medical history)?
The Secretary of Defense, Pete Hegseth, enthusiastically signed this jewel of regulation, justifying that combatants must be “physically and mentally capable of performing their duties under the harshest conditions.” Of course, because in the middle of a battlefield, the last thing you want is someone who, I don’t know, gets distracted by a bird or needs to take their schizophrenia pills. Priorities, friends.
Medical exemptions used to be that little bureaucratic trick to get kids in who otherwise wouldn’t qualify. Asthma? Eh, it depends. A knee surgery ten years ago? Hmm, maybe. A cornea transplant? Well, if the secretary on duty is in a good mood. But now, the “unfit” list is so long that even Wolverine would have trouble getting in (pacemaker? Disqualified!).
And let’s not forget past psychotic disorders or suicide attempts in the last year. Because obviously, if someone has had a bad day (or twelve months), they definitely can’t handle a rifle. Or yes? Who knows. The Pentagon prefers not to risk it.
And now what? An army of perfect clones?
The irony is that, as the world moves towards inclusion, the US military seems to be going back to the times when only those “pure in body and soul” could serve. Next step? DNA tests to rule out those with a predisposition to premature gray hair?
Meanwhile, recruiters will have to make do with a shrinking pool of candidates. Unless, of course, they start considering cyborgs or virtual soldiers. After all, if the priority is to avoid risks, what better than an algorithm that never suffers a panic attack?
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