The 700 million butcher shop: Prime steak or pure bone?
From the dusty lands of Durango, where the cacti are more numerous than the opportunities, our President Claudia Sheinbaum Pardo decided to play the cattle fairy godmother. As part of his already famous Plan Mexico (because naming everything after the country is very patriotic), he announced with great fanfare a comprehensive program for meat production. Not just any meat, oh no! This is the best quality meat. Because, clearly, the previous plans were to produce second-rate meat, right?
The investment is around 700 million pesos, a figure so round and beautiful that it almost makes you cry. This succulent cake will be distributed among the lucky ranchers of Durango, Coahuila and Sonora. Because what better way to combat poverty than by giving away bovine studs and fattening funds? The declared goal is to supply the domestic market and, in the process, conquer the international palate with our exports. All this, while the United States closes the border to Mexican cattle due to the screwworm. A minor detail, without a doubt.
Sheinbaum, in a display of transparency that leaves us all speechless, thanked the “willingness” of the ranchers. Because, of course, who would refuse to receive millions? The worm containment strategy seems about as effective as a mosquito net in a hurricane, but hey, at least the meat will be of premium quality.
The endless parade of benevolent figures
In order not to fall short in the art of information overload, the President released a string of numbers that would make an accountant pale. In Durango, 830,532 people receive direct support. Yes, you read that right: every last person counts! The annual investment is 14 thousand 299 million pesos, because why save when you can distribute?
The list is as long as the line for a Bad Bunny concert: 199,510 seniors with pensions, 13,064 with disabilities, 11,802 young people building the future (or waiting to be assigned one), 7,378 scholarship recipients writing their future (on probably recycled paper), 65,473 with Benito Juárez scholarships, 35,000 children with primary school scholarships (because education can be bought, apparently), and 6,823 parents receiving support for children from 0 to 4 years old (did someone say birth incentive?).
And if that were not enough: 46,017 in Production for Well-being, 2,276 with Guarantee Prices, 20,183 sowing life (or was it sowing dependency?), 41,000 with free fertilizers (goodbye, predatory agroindustries!), 1,685 educational establishments intervened (which sounds more like a surgical operation than an improvement), and 131,000 receiving milk for well-being (because a lactating country is a happy country).
The new programs are not far behind: 44,123 women with the Women’s Wellbeing Pension (clientel feminism exists), 74,121 adolescents with the Rita Cetina scholarship (because nothing says “empowerment” like a bank deposit), and a house-to-house round of doctors for all older adults and people with disabilities. Will it be like a visit from Tupperware, but with thermometers?
Pharaonic works and trains that promise to unite even the soul
But not everything is money given away. There are also works that will make the earth vibrate. The San Ignacio-Tayoltita highway, seven artisanal roads in the Mezquital (made by hand?), repaving of federal roads, 5,400 homes from Conavi and 35,000 from Infonavit. Because building houses is easy; The difficult thing is ensuring that they have water and electricity.
The modernization of Irrigation District 017 in La Laguna sounds like a sci-fi movie, the Guadalupe Victoria water treatment plant a historical monument, and the Tunal II Dam a failed sequel. New high schools and a UNRC campus complete the menu. Did anyone ask for more educational infrastructure without well-paid teachers?
And then, the main course: the Saltillo-Nuevo Laredo train. Sheinbaum announced it from Nuevo León with the solemnity of someone discovering a new planet. The passenger train, which will also carry freight (just in case), will unite communities and enhance regional development. Because, according to her, where there is a railway station, there is local economic development. Did anyone tell that to the ghost towns of the old west?
In addition, he promised an IMSS UMF, CECIs, a Regional Hospital, two high school schools, and LIBRE centers for women victims of violence. Because nothing says “we are with you” like a new building. In housing, 10,000 houses from Conavi and 50,000 from Infonavit. Will they be as resistant as the promises?
Poverty is reduced as if by magic
Sheinbaum highlighted the historical reduction in poverty: 13.5 million people escaped it between 2018 and 2024. Thanks to the increase in the minimum wage, the recovery of public works and the Wellness Programs. In Nuevo León, 1.4 million people receive support for 27,365 million pesos per year. A bargain, if we ignore that multidimensional poverty continues to lurk.
Governor Samuel García, always timely, praised Sheinbaum’s “bravery” in defending Mexico against US tariffs. And he highlighted that security coordination reduced homicides by 70%. Because, of course, when you distribute so much support, even criminals get distracted.
In short, one more day in the paradise of the fourth transformation: a lot of money circulating, works announced with religious fervor, and an unwavering faith that the national carnage will be the envy of the world. Will we be able to export meat of the best quality while the screwworm does its thing? Time, and the bills, will tell.
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