A Gentleman’s (and Market) Agreement
It seems that the local Morena deputies have discovered, to the surprise of absolutely no one, that giving away things right in front of where people sell those same things is not the most brilliant business strategy in the world. After what we can only imagine as epic work tables full of cheap coffee and palpable tensions, they reached a revolutionary agreement with the tenants of the public markets: they will no longer be the most obvious unfair competition in history.
In a display of respect for the nature of these spaces – a nature that, apparently, does not include a political party with a parliamentary majority setting up a free stall next to you – the Morenistas solemnly promise to refrain from their distribution days of essential products in the vicinity. How magnanimous. It’s as if an elephant in a china shop promised not to tap dance, but only on Tuesdays.
The Propaganda That Will Not Be (So Visible)
But the commitment doesn’t end there, oh no. The pièce de résistance of this monumental peace treaty is that they will also refrain from placing propaganda, banners or signs announcing their generosity in and around the markets. Because, let’s be clear, charity is much more effective when it is not advertised, right? Or, wait…wasn’t that just the point? The irony of having to agree that selfless help stops being a traveling advertising campaign is simply delicious.
The Morena coordinator, Xóchitl Bravo, was quick to clarify that they were the only parliamentary group that answered “the first call.” One wonders what the urgency was: to prevent a riot of greengrocers armed with lettuce? Bravo pointed out, with a conviction that leaves us all speechless, that for them public markets are not political loot. Of course not. They are just the perfect setting for actions that, by pure chance, generate unwavering electoral loyalty.
They expand, they tell us, “the entire range of proposals.” A range that, curiously, always seems to include a photo of a smiling MP next to a box of tomatoes. They talk about strengthening the local economy and joint actions, which in the language of real politics translates into: “okay, we won’t distribute here, but let’s look for another equally busy corner.”
El cinismo alcanza su cúspide cuando proclaman buscar una relación armónica con los locatarios. Porque nada es más armonioso que tener que negociar para que dejen de perjudicarte económicamente. Es el equivalente político de decir “deja de golpearte con este palo” y esperar un agradecimiento por ello.
This sublime exercise in realpolitik leaves us with an invaluable lesson: in the great fair of politics, even charity needs its rules. And Morena, in a gesture that would undoubtedly deserve the Nobel Prize for Non-Disturbing, has decided to write them. Por el momento, los mercados pueden respirar aliviados. Hasta que encuentren el siguiente puesto de abasto “popular” a solo tres cuadras de distancia.
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