Veracruz justice, in its eternal fight against crime (or at least that’s what the bulletins say)
The Attorney General of Veracruz, in a statement that they probably wrote while drinking overheated coffee, announced with great fanfare the arrest of a third person for the kidnapping of Irma Hernández Cruz, a taxi driver and retired teacher who, for refusing to pay extortion, ended up being a victim of organized crime in Álamo Temapache. Because, of course, in Mexico sometimes retirement is not synonymous with rest, but with nightmares with Tamaulipas license plates.
Operation “we captured another, but the problem continues”
It turns out that this arrest is the second in the case, after Víctor Manuel “N” and José Eduardo “N” (because using full names is too mainstream for organized crime) were arrested. But don’t worry, the security forces — which include the Navy, the National Defense and even the police officer guarding the tamale stand — managed to capture Jeana Paola “N”, who, according to the authorities, is as delinquent as her cronies. Although, to be honest, with that arsenal he carried, I doubt they need much evidence.
Among the secured objects there was a firearm (because in Mexico even the purchase notes are accompanied by a 9mm), a floor collection list (or “alternative accounting record”, as criminal entrepreneurs call it), bags of green grass (which, according to unofficial sources, was not parsley), cartridges ballistics and, most intriguingly, a faggot type suitcase. Because nothing says “professional criminal” like carrying your belongings in an accessory that looks like it came from a 90s bazaar.
To top it off, the truck with Tamaulipas license plates. Because, obviously, if you are going to commit crimes in Veracruz, the logical thing is to do it in a vehicle that screams: “I am a foreigner and probably linked to something shady!”.
Jeana Paola “N” will be brought before the corresponding prosecutor (hopefully not the same one who lost the files last week). Meanwhile, the question we are all asking is: how many more are missing? Because, at the rate they’re going, this looks like a season of La Casa de Papel, but with less glamor and more bags of marijuana.
Are you outraged by this case? Share this note and help us make visible the violence that continues to plague Mexico. And if you want more stories where sarcasm and reality go hand in hand, explore our related content. Of course, without any fagot suitcases, we promise.
