When deputies play “saviors” (but only of their comrades)
Imagine this: Iván Escalante, the head of Profeco, in the middle of a meeting with the Labor Commission, dropping the bomb: “Oh, deputies, stop acting as ‘lawyers’ at crooked gas stations”. Yes, as if they were influencers asking for a discount at a restaurant, but with the power of the seat in hand. The scenario is worthy of a reality show: morenoist politicians calling to “mediate” for businessmen who, surprise, turn out to have hoses that do not supply full liters (that is, stealing like in quarantine times).
“Don’t intervene if you don’t know”: The living meme of Profeco
Escalante, with the patience of a kindergarten teacher on a recess day, asked legislators not to get involved if they do not know the background. “When there is injustice, I take action,” he said, as if he were the hero of an anti-corruption soap opera. But here’s the plot twist: Claudia Sheinbaum herself gave him the green light to close whatever it was, even if the deputies cried to him on WhatsApp. “The president has never told me ‘don’t do your job,'” he said, making it clear that some party colleagues seem more concerned about saving fifi hotels with cockroaches than about the consumer.
And speaking of hotels… how about that four high-level brunettes (not names, because that’s what the *mystery* is for) called to avoid the closure of a place with “VIP at Coachella” prices but with street stall hygiene? Escalante told it with the drama of a Twitter thread: “Up to half an hour after putting the stamps on, I was inundated with calls… but I dialed the boss and she told me: ‘Come on, it’s your job.'” Spoiler: the hotel ended up closed for six days and paying a fine, like when they catch you sneaking into the subway.
Gas stations and records that “disappear” (until the photo comes out)
The most viral moment was when a representative alleged that Profeco employees “abused” in a review. Result: the report was signed by Guadalupe Morales (yes, the same one who said she had not received anything), with a photo and time included. “It can’t be, buddy”, Escalante must have thought, while preparing the screenshoot for the chat group. Between this and the 250 immobilized hoses in 18 states, it is clear that the issue is not just about “technical errors”, but about a network that uses political contacts as a shield.
Millennial moral: If your gas station sells air instead of full liters, it’s better not to invoke your buddy deputies… because Profeco comes with evidence and even Instagram stories. And if you are a fifi hotel, hire an exterminator before a lobbyist.
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