The Diplomacy of “It’s Not Our Fart”, Presidential Version
In a display of diplomatic balance worthy of a tightrope walker on a lava, President Claudia Sheinbaum Pardo today offered a master’s degree in the art of not getting wet. The hot topic: the 27-year prison sentence of former Brazilian president Jair Bolsonaro for an attempted coup against his successor, Luiz Inácio Lula da Silva. An unimportant little thing, right?
From the majestic National Palace, in her now traditional morning conference this Monday, September 22, our president used what is perhaps the most versatile phrase in international politics: “We do not have to take a position”. Tachan! Here is the magic formula to avoid any uncomfortable question. Doesn’t it remind you of when they ask you about your mother-in-law at a family gathering and you respond “it’s an issue that strictly concerns my husband’s family”?
Unconditional Support (but with Conditions of No Opinion)
The strategy was as subtle as an elephant in a china shop, but with better vocabulary. First, the disrespect of neutrality: “It’s Brazil’s decision,” he declared, as if a political earthquake of that magnitude in the largest nation in Latin America were a small municipal matter about garbage collection schedules. Of course, with the technical-legal addition that it is “a decision of the Court of Brazil“, in case someone thought that the sentence had been issued by a popular jury on a television program.
And then, the script twist. After washing his hands with the elegance of Pontius Pilate on a particularly diplomatic day, he proceeded to declare his unwavering and unconditional support for President Lula. Of course, that support is, I quote, “independent of giving an opinion on a particular trial in Brazil.” A marvel of modern logic: “We support you wholeheartedly, dear ally, as long as our support does not imply having to specifically refer to the monumental event that has consolidated you in power and shaken the foundations of your country.” Can we be clearer?
One can almost imagine the scene: “Lula, brother, you can count on us for whatever you need. What about Bolsonaro? Oh, no, we don’t even mention that. It’s as if that man who was in prison for 27 years had simply gone on a perpetual vacation to a maximum security prison. Hugs, not bullets (and no opinions either)!”
The rhetorical question that floats in the air, heavier than an hour and a half speech, is: what the hell does “support” really mean in the lexicon of the Mexican Foreign Ministry? Does it consist of sending strong positive vibes and a bouquet of flowers by diplomatic mail, but stopping any value judgments about the fact that defines your colleague’s presidency? It’s like saying “I fully support your divorce” but refusing to comment on the lover your friend found in the closet. An ethereal, abstract, almost philosophical support.
Sheinbaum, with the precision of a surgeon avoiding a vital organ, achieved the goal: not to alienate anyone (or maybe everyone a little bit). Neither to the Bolsonaristas who could be listening (although probably not in La Mañanera), nor to the Lulistas who expected an open celebration. It is the dance of diplomacy at its finest: many side steps, a turn on oneself and a smile that does not compromise anything. Bravo for the performance. The Oscar for Best Escape in a Political Drama is more than deserved.
What does this realpolitik lesson flavored with morning coffee leave us? Well, in the international arena, sometimes silence (or its first cousin, the empty declaration) is golden. Meanwhile, Bolsonaro packs his bags for a long stay and Lula thanks the “support” which, to be honest, sounds more like “we’re watching the game from the stands, but with your team’s shirt on.” Of course, without shouting joints.
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